This Isn't Working by Catherine Altman Morgan

Author:Catherine Altman Morgan [Morgan, Catherine Altman]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2023-01-02T19:05:01+00:00

8

CONNECTION TO SELF AND OTHERS

ICAN HARDLY remember life before the internet, Google, and social media. Never in the history of mankind have humans been bombarded with the quantity of information available now. Millions and millions of dollars are spent trying to keep us connected. However, our lives go off the rails when our technology starts owning us. The pandemic connected us through technology, sometimes more than ever, but many times, it also left us feeling more isolated and alone.

In-person connection is critical for our mental and physical health—and it pains this introvert to say so. As a solo professional who was single during stay at home, I was working alone and living alone. I couldn’t go out to interact with people or see live music, which brings me great joy. It was way too much alone time, and I really like my own company.

Technology is great, and I wouldn’t want to live without it, but it also has a shadow side that we need to manage. Can you get addicted to your phone and checking messages and social media? Absolutely.

Can social media be nourishing and supportive but also triggering? Absolutely.

In this chapter, we will objectively examine our relationships with technology and other people and try to come up with some ways to keep connected to self and others.

TECHNOLOGY CONNECTS AND ALSO TRIGGERS

Most of us need to tame our technology habits and realize we have developed addictive patterns, if not a full-on addiction. As a reminder, your technology should work for you, not the other way around. Smartphones are making us crazy and stupid because social media is amazing and also triggering. I love social media. I honestly would not have gotten through the stay-at-home months without some of my Facebook groups, and yes, I know about the giant issues with the algorithm and privacy invasion. That said, I have friends around the globe, and I love being connected and sharing.

But comparison despair is a real thing, and social media can be brutal to your self-esteem when you’re struggling. As entrepreneur, New York Times best-selling author, and philanthropist Marie Forleo says, “People say comparison is the thief of joy. I’ve called it the Hamburglar of happiness. But when it comes to your small business, it gets even more dire because comparison really is the robber of results, the pillager of profits, the pickpocket of prosperity, and those are three things that every entrepreneur needs in order to survive.”34

I would be remiss if I didn’t mention politics and social media and how triggering that can be. Like many people, I unfriended and unfollowed a lot of people during the last two election cycles and during stay at home. For your self-esteem and sanity, you need to establish boundaries with yourself and others on social media. It’s not worth having your blood pressure spike or your productivity tank and mood ruined. Some days you just need to walk away. Mostly, interacting or commenting won’t change anyone’s mind. Let that stuff go.

And sometimes we even need to unfriend or block family members.

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